Even the Undead are Lovin It

November 13, 2009 at 11:18 am | Posted in Around Boston | 2 Comments
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I had a frightening experience at the Golden Arches. While chatting with a couple of my girlfriends, I looked up and locked eyes with a terrifying stranger with bright red eyes. I kid you not. It was like looking at a photograph that had not been scrubbed for red-eye exposure. Except he was eating a #10 value meal (10pc chicken nuggets and fries, as if you didn’t know).

Sarah tried to convince me he was just wearing colored contacts, but I know better. I’ve seen Lost Boys and Interview with a Vampire. And I’ve read the entire Twilight Series (Edward Cullen! Dreamy!). I know what we are up against, dear reader(s).

And vampires love Mickey D’s french fries. And who can blame them? If I were undead, I’d be dipping those salty, crispy shoestring fries in blood all night long.



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  1. I wonder what being undead does to your metabolism. If they are up all night they must be eating at bizarre hours. I've never seen an overweight vampire, in fact, the majority of them are actually very attractive. Maybe it's the blood or maybe it's the french fries. Whatever it is, keep it up!

  2. Have you seen True Blood? TV never lies, so apparently there ARE less attractive vamps (and lots and lots of really trashy ones!!), they just seem much more rare than the blood sucking hotties… But the bizarre hours thing sounds like an interesting diet option.

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