I Quit!

November 9, 2010 at 9:20 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 15 Comments
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I can hardly wait to utter those words! You see, I’ve been working my tail off to make ends meet (okay, it’s not that dire, but I’m certainly not rolling in it) for years now and honestly, I’m getting pretty tired of it.

Unfortunately I married for love, not money, so that solution is out. I seriously doubt I have a mysterious relative I’ve never even met who has decided to leave me boatloads of money when he passes away. And goodness knows I’m not raking in the cash at my job, so I have to continue working ad infinitum. The whole thing seemed fairly hopeless… until yesterday.

Who needs luck when I have Tzarina?

You see, my gal Rhymes-with-Tzarina is on an adventure in Japan this week, and she’s going to be the key to our financial liberation. How, you may ask? Well, dear reader(s), in Japan, it’s already tomorrow!

Which means it’s practically like she time-traveled.

Which means she is in the future.

Which means she can tell me what happened in the past.

Which means she’s gonna give me the inside scoop on some lucky numbers!

Here’s the plan: I’ll buy “the” lotto ticket today and be a new-money-goddess by Wednesday! Then Tzarina and I will split the winnings. Flawless!

So if you want me to be generous once I’m made in the shade, now’s the time to break out in dance to the Sycophant Shuffle!



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  1. And don’t forget dear old Dad!

    • I could never forget you, RWFOTB! Prepare for a life of luxury!!

  2. Hahahaha! L-Ski’s poor….but, he’s rich because he has you. Joke’s on me 😉

    • I’d give that a 4 on the suck-up scale… good enough to get a mediocre gift that will help show off my new status, but not Ferrari-worthy.
      Maybe I’ll let you swim in my pool o’ bills (complete with a “make it rain” waterfall) someday.

      • I give YOU a 4 on the…blogger scale! You just lost a reader, Missy!

        • Ouch… You cut me deep, man. No dip in my money pool for you!

          • Interpersonal jabs notwithstanding, I’m curious about his money pool. I’m thinking Scrooge McDuck with a diving board. You might also consider a “make it hail” dime shower for all of your 4 point friends.

            • Hahahah, Scrooge McDuck was EXACTLY what I was thinking of! Only a bigger pool with more moolah.
              As for the “make it hail” shower? LOVE!
              Brooke, you’re a riot! When I’m ridiculously wealthy and throw my money around like it’s litter, I plan to pay you a ridiculous salary to simply amuse me with silly comments and cartoon references 🙂

            • Thanks for the love. I would be happy to make rediculous sums of money purely for your amusement … and then we could all go to Wagamama. Came across this article today (and just in case number 1 didn’t work out for you as planned) wanted to give you 9 other options for pursuing your dream. http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/RetirementandWills/RetireInStyle/10-shortcuts-to-easy-street.aspx?cp-documentid=26226697&GT1=33013

  3. In NY “All you need is a dollar and a dream”. NOT! So, sorry Sarah, but I don’t think you’ll be able to utter those words for many years to come. My suggestion (for those many years) is to up your %age to your 401K plan; social security’s not lookin too good either!

    • Dear Schmatti,

      While I appreciate your sound, logical advice, I don’t appreciate you poo-pooing my best laid plan. No extravagent gift for you, missy!
      (But I’ll take the free advice anyway)

  4. Pure genius! Can I take a dip in your “make it rain” waterfall?

    • Take a dip? You’re my “make it rain” waterfall lifeguard!

  5. You are a genius Sarah – I am sure rhymes with Tzarina will work on that for you!!! Dreams!!!!

    • Thanks, Lils! I got the ticket – tomorrow is the big reveal 😉 Prepare to spend oodles of money on silly nonsense! Gotta stimulate the economy!

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