I Quit – Part Deux

November 11, 2010 at 2:49 pm | Posted in Around Boston, Office Humor | 7 Comments
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Today was supposed to be the big day.  I was going to put myself on a pedestal, hop on my high horse, triumphantly enter my office and inform my colleagues (who I may or may not have planned to refer to as “chumps”) that they would no longer have the pleasure of my sparkling wit and enviable companionship.  I was gonna tell them that they could take my “salary” and (mom, please don’t read this part) shove it.  Because I didn’t need them anymore!  I’d make some noise, flip some birds and burn some bridges.


Yeah... It's gonna be like that...

You see, I was planning to win the lottery last night.  Tzarina and I had it all figured out.  But like so many of our best-laid plans, something went horribly wrong.


Tzarina told me that, from where she stood in the future (aka being in Japan where she’s a day ahead of me), she was certain the winning PowerBall number had an 8 in it.  So I bought a ticket with the number 8 in it.  And the winning numbers drawn included an 8… just not where I put it, or surrounded by the other numbers I chose.

In other words, I did not win the PowerBall drawing.  And this morning I could not quit my job.  Or mouth off to my colleagues.  Or lay to rest my financial concerns.

I’m depressed and disappointed.  And I’m even poorer than I was yesterday before I bought the PowerBall ticket.  And I intend to blame some idiotic butterfly in Africa for screwing me over.  Jerk.



P.S. A special note to my colleagues reading this post: Just kidding!!  You know I’d never ever leave you… not even for a better paying gig that didn’t include a horrendous commute… He. He. He.  This is awkward…


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  1. Maybe we can find a Keno machine, SG;)

    • Hahahaha – I can use a certain someone whose name rhymes-with-yawn as my coach and good luck charm! I’ve heard he’s a Keno-pro (that’s so weird to type…)

  2. You know what’s even more awkward, Sarah? I also took Tsarina’s advice and bought a lotto ticket with an 8 in it. But unlike you, I didn’t wait to make sure I actually won. I flipped off my colleagues and went all Office Space on my copier. How embarrassing for me this morning when I realized that not only did I not win the lottery, but I don’t have any colleagues. Or a copier.

    • LOL!!

      At least you don’t have to apologize and beg for forgiveness from said imaginary colleagues or pay an expensive repair bill for your imaginary copier.

      • That’s what you think! I gave myself some pretty serious attitude all day yesterday.

  3. Nothing important to say other than that I LOL’ed at April giving herself attitude.

    • Ditto! And then I pictured her at the water cool b*tching to herself about her own attitude problem 😉

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