Chocolate-Covered Bacon… The Real Deal

July 1, 2011 at 6:18 am | Posted in In The Kitchen, Photo Phriday | 3 Comments
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Remember when I spent too much cash on a bar of dark chocolate with bacon in it and I was sorely disappointed because the bacon was miniscule? Our good buddy Dan, who blogs over at Squibix, suggested the obvious solution of making my own. So I finally found myself with some leftover bacon, some melted dark chocolate and clearly too much time on my hands. And I got my chocolatiering on.* Here’s the final product:

chocolate-covered bacon

mmm... chocolatey confections.

The little balls on the left are scrumptious truffles that are ridiculously easy to make. They are why I happened to have some melted dark chocolate.

So I dipped my leftover bacon in my leftover chocolate. And the cholesterol gods were obviously in my head because I actually sprinkled some kosher salt on some of the bacon strips post-dipping. Because salt nicely complements chocolate. And I’m trying to clog my arteries.

I was beyond excited to taste my creation. And I was in a giving mood, so I invited my SIL Tracy to partake in the tasting. What did we think? Drumroll, please…

Meh. As Tracy so wisely noted, you desperately want to love the combination of two of your favorite foods. Which makes it so much worse when the combination really isn’t that good. Apparently bacon and chocolate are destined to maintain a safe distance from one another. Sigh.


*Random note: I am obsessed with the idea of becoming a chocolatier. Not that I’m taking any steps to become one or have any sort of experience other than enjoyment of the final product. But I have seen Chocolat more times than I can count and I desperately want to be Juliette Binoche’s character. One of the best compliments I ever received was when my book club gal pals decided that she was the actress I most look like. Swoon.

Review: Mo’s Dark Bacon Bar

May 10, 2011 at 8:17 am | Posted in Misc. | 6 Comments
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Next week is one of the biggest events of the year for one of my networking groups. We’ll be having a silent auction of a variety of gift baskets donated by our committees and members. And since I sit on two committees and am always looking to expand my Mary Kay customer base, I’m making several baskets.

Last night was my Community Service Committee meeting. Everyone had to bring in some chocolate for our cocoa-themed basket. Let me first issue a warning to anyone looking to bid on that basket. I will cut you. I need that basket.

Hoodles. I swung by the grocery store to end all grocery stores last night on my way to the meeting to snag a delish bar of chocolate for my basket. And as I perused the various offerings, from your ho-hum Hershey’s to more exotic wares (chiles and cherries, anyone?), I stumbled across the Holy Grail of cocoa-based confections. Mo’s Dark Bacon Bar. Even my inner Scrooge didn’t care that the price tag was a bit higher than what I ever spend on candy. Heck, the delectable treat I donated to our chocolate basket was on sale! But when I saw the combination of two of my faves in bar form, my brain got stuck on “Bacon and chocolate… bacon and chocolate… bacon and chocolate…”

In the checkout, the young cashier paused to examine my purchase. I assured him his eyes did not deceive him. Which prompted the woman behind me to exclaim how she thought that sort of combo could only be found in NYC. Woman, please! Bryan the cashier requested that I return to give him a full review. A promise I made in exchange for not sharing with him immediately.

I could hardly wait for my meeting to end so I could taste my chocolate. And even though the meeting went long, I sat in my car in a quickly emptying parking lot to take my first bite. I want to tell you that this creation was so incredible I slapped my grandma and jumped up and testified. But I didn’t. Because it wasn’t. How could dark chocolate, applewood smoked bacon and alderwood smoked salt not be incredible? Unless you don’t eat pork, which I understand is trayf if you are Jewish, so please don’t point that out to me.  Besides this being a rhetorical question, I am posing this to those who share my passion for pig.

I couldn’t accept that Mo had erred. Which also would mean my tastes had erred. And that ain’t happening. I blamed a residual spearmintiness in my mouth from the gum I had just spit onto the back of my hand prior to indulging in pricey chocolate. So a few hours later, after a piece of pizza and a Smuttynose Old Brown Dog Ale, I tried again. Maybe salty, bacony chocolate is best enjoyed with beer and pizza, right? Alas, my grandma still didn’t get slapped. Although it was a little better.

So this morning I will give it one last try before I form my ultimate opinion. Here goes…

Grandma, your face is safe. The chocolate is divine, with a hint of smokey salt. But where’s the bacon? Infinitesimal porcine crumbs ain’t cutting it for this gal. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll eat this bar. And I’ll relish every bite. But for the price I paid? Honey, I want to be able to see the pork. So Bryan, save your money. I’m sure there is a tastier offering out there. The hunt continues…


Happy Birthday, Fellas!

January 5, 2011 at 9:15 am | Posted in Around Boston | 2 Comments
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Bringing home the bacon cake. Happy Birthday, Mike & Andrew!

This week marks the “existence-anniversaries” of two of our biggest fans. Sure, they rarely deign to read our online musings, but they do bring home the bacon, or, in Andrew’s case, the fakon (that’s fake-bacon for all you non-Hebs and non-vegetarians), so that warrants a shout-out.

As crazy as it sounds, April and I married men whose birthdays are just two days apart! Is there something about being born in the first week of January that draws these men to witty gals like us? Or is it something about our self-proclaimed wittiness that draws us to men born in the first week of January? The world may never know…

Happy birthday week, fellas!

Photo Phriday: Bacon & Rocketry!

October 15, 2010 at 8:18 am | Posted in Photo Phriday | 1 Comment
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You don’t have to eat bacon to enjoy it. Special thanks to Tracy for sending me this video.

And yeah, I know today is supposed to be a funny pic. But isn’t a video of crazy Brits even better?  You’re welcome.

Happy Friday!


Bacon, the Wonder Food

August 18, 2010 at 6:57 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments
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At the risk of reigniting the bacon war, I feel compelled to share with you some facts about bacon. Because I love the pig. I really do. And according to fact #6, it is what some people would call my unholy adoration of salty swine that is behind my little boy’s intelligence — and is currently making another in utero bambino “wicked smaht.”

Here’s another thing to consider. According to the latest issue of Cooking Light, a strip of bacon is actually a healthier choice than Au Bon Pain‘s bran muffin. In terms of saturated fat, anyway.

Also, I am still waiting for someone to provide me with a sample of chocolate-covered bacon. Because I’d like to report on how it tastes, since no one seems to have actually eaten this before. Do you see the lengths to which I am willing to go for you, Dear Reader(s)? It’s not a glamorous job, but for you I will do it.

These are things you should know this morning. You’re welcome. I’m going to go make some breakfast.


April & Sarah’s Separation: Day 1, Update 3

April 26, 2010 at 1:33 pm | Posted in Around Boston, Office Humor | 3 Comments
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There’s a plethora of junk food in the kitchen and I suffer from fairly serious afternoon snack attacks. I’m in danger of a “healthy eating plan” violation. Help.

No thank you...

April used to tell me that she personally rubbed all the tempting food with bacon, knowing that as a good Jewish girl, I wouldn’t even consider eating it. Without her, this work environment has the makings of a waist-line disaster…

Thankfully my pal RWC has stepped up to fill in as my personal hero (someone get her a cape!). She has made invaluable sacrifices including: eating the last piece of pie to help me avoid temptation, telling me bagels are gross and the cream cheese tastes like refrigerator (you know that taste – ick), offering to share her raw almonds with me, and even volunteering to take me for a walk around lunchtime. She’s a keeper!

But we both miss April. Don’t be surprised if you find us hiding in a corner, hugging each other as we sway back and forth, mumbling incoherently in an effort to keep the loneliness away. At least we are dealing with the pain of withdrawal together…

Back to my corner,


Reader’s Mailbag: Chocolate-Covered Bacon is a Chocolate-Covered No-No!

October 23, 2009 at 8:04 am | Posted in Heebs | Leave a comment
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Dear Reader “T,” “Anonymous Commenter” and my bloggier half,

While I have an undeniable and often uncontrollable love of chocolate, the idea of chocolate-covered bacon does not entice me enough to shame my Rabbi (and he doesn’t even read this blog, so you know I am not saying that just to suck up).

As you can probably guess, I think covering something you don’t like in chocolate doesn’t usually make anything tempting enough to eat.For example, my mom, who despises poop jokes, wonders if you might be enticed by chocolate covered p… never mind.

Happily, I have probably already discovered my greatest love (chocolate + peanut butter!) so I feel no urge to stray from that formula, or at least to stray farther than established combinations including: mint + chocolate, coffee + chocolate, strawberries + chocolate, milk + chocolate, cake + chocolate, ice cream + chocolate, etc.

But I do appreciate the email and inquiry – please keep them coming!We love participation, topic suggestions, comments, questions, Fbook messages, tweets, stalkers (not you, Tom Cruise), and you, our dear reader(s)!


Reader’s Mailbag: Chocolate-Covered Bacon

October 20, 2009 at 11:49 am | Posted in In The Kitchen | 1 Comment
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A reader recently emailed us:
While the story of how I became aware of the existence of chocolate covered bacon is mildly amusing, I will save that for another time. I need to know what the Wilderoll’s think about this culinary um, dish. Is pork covered with chocolate enough to sway a devout Hebrew to cross over to the dark side? Or, is it so far over the edge that a bacon devotee becomes immune to its powers? I will wait to see the outcome of these burning questions…

Hmmm… Chocolate and bacon. Two of my favorite things. Together. For-ev-er! I like it. But only if the bacon is soft. I hate crunchy (or “crisp” as the foodies say) bacon.

I’m trying to figure out why any non-Heeb would object. And I can say “Heeb” because I say it with love. And because Sarah tells me I’m basically Jewish — except for the loving Jesus part, but he was Jewish, so I don’t see the problem. And the whole pork thing, but I know some Chosen People who dig pig, so I’m good there, too. Actually, Sarah says I must secretly be a Jewish Minnesotan because I love the idea of eating everything on a stick. But that’s another story altogether.

Hoodles, on the matter of chocolate-covered bacon, I say yay.

But wait. Let’s think about this. I always thought chocolate-covered potato chips would be awesome and I was really excited to find them in a candy store in Old Forge. Until I asked the girl for a sample and that little witch forced me to purchase 1/4 lb. because there are no samples. But I was still ok because what’s not to love about chocolate-covered potato chips? And I found out there is a lot not to love about chocolate-covered potato chips. At least the ones I ate, anyway.

So my answer, T, is that I am not opposed to chocolate-covered bacon. In fact, if you bring me some, I will eat it and give you a definitive answer. Like how I just demanded a gift?

Editor’s Note: Got a question? Email, text, twitter, facebook, call, stalk — do what you have to do to ask us. We might have an answer. And we won’t always demand gifts. But we will accept them. WINK!

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