Rich People Problems

July 9, 2013 at 11:37 am | Posted in Family, Married Life | Leave a comment
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The other day the hubs and I were bickering about household chores – he feels like he does the lion’s share and that I spend more time reading baseball blogs than helping.  I feel like he needs to relax every once in a while and understand that our house will never be as clean or tidy as he imagines it should be.

Okay, okay, it was the opposite, but sometimes it’s refreshing to pretend it’s the gal who puts sports over washing bottles.  Annnywho, in one of my dramatic retorts, I said something like:

“Fine, I’ll just get the maid to do it!  But you never help plan menus with the chef, the gardener is still waiting to hear exactly how many millimeters you’d like him to hand trim off the lawn, and the chauffeur has really been slacking on polishing the dipstick handle.  Can you get off your lazy butt and order people around for a change?  Or do I have to manage the staff alone as usual?”

I think my golden throne (haha) needs polishing!  Where's the bathroom maid?!?

I think my golden throne (haha) needs polishing! Where’s the bathroom maid?!?

It was enough to break the tension between us, but that got me thinking: is that how fights between the uber rich actually sound?  What do the gajillionaire couples of the world squabble about?  Because I’ll bet it’s not dishes, laundry, or which bill to pay first and which to postpone.

I think an experiment is in order.  Here’s what I propose: give me a few gajillion dollars (one of you can give me a lump sum or take up a collection or something; how you make this happen isn’t the important part – don’t be penny wise and gajillion foolish).  I’ll move into a mansion, hire a full-fledged staff (first hire: a personal assistant and then a household manager who will actually hire the rest of the staff for me – that’s not something a gajillionaire like me should have to concern herself with), and report back.  I promise to answer this, and any other questions you have about how the upper crust lives.  We’ll all be the wiser!

You can’t put a price on knowledge like that.  But do try.

Mothering my Husband?

February 10, 2011 at 9:41 am | Posted in Around Boston, Married Life | 5 Comments
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Around quarter past five last night my more-scholarly-half called to check in…

“Hey Sarah, how was your day?”

Hi Andrew! Not over yet – I’m at work, and I still don’t feel well. Are you on your way to class?”

“Yup! Sorry you haven’t kicked the flu yet.”

“Thanks!” Pause. “Ummm…” Pause. “Everything okay, Andrew?”

“Yeah, everything is fine. But… I need a favor.”

“What kind of favor?”

“I left my homework at home today and I really need it for class tonight – it’s two week’s worth of work and I have to turn it in, so…” Pause. Long, awkward, ‘pregnant pause’ (if you’ll pardon the expression).

“Okay, I’ll bite: what’s the favor?” (As if I didn’t know).

“Can you pick up my school bag and bring it to me?”

So I hung up the phone, raced to the subway so I could catch the commuter rail, drove home from the station, got his backpack (with said tardy homework), floored it to BU’s North Campus and dropped it off. Why? Because that’s what good wives do.

And then it occurred to me: that’s not what wives do, that’s what moms do! I think I just mothered my husband!!

But, as my dear friend and colleague, Rhymes-With-Cannon said (as she sprinted with me to the subway), Valentine’s Day is in less than a week, and that kid owes me! Mwahahaha!

~Sarah

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