Less Than Two Weeks to Wedded Bliss!

September 29, 2010 at 9:15 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments
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Well, dear reader(s), it is less than two weeks until I make an honest man out of Andrew (but don’t tell TheKnot.com). Do you hear that? Single ladies cryin’ the world over. Sorry, gals – he’ll soon be off the market for good.

Adam Zyglis of The Buffalo News' depiction of brides

Help me, doc!

The big stuff is all taken care of – it is the little stuff they don’t warn you about. As such, my superwoman of a mom (you may recognize her by her blog name, Sarah’s Mo) and I have declared this Saturday: “Get ‘er Done Day.”

Between the hours of 10 a.m. and 4 p.m., we will be workin’ like maniacs to assemble our programs, create our favors, and add all those special touches that make a wedding so much work… errr, I mean that make a wedding so special and beautiful.

Andrew lucked out can’t join us because he has a seminar all day, but he will be there in spirit. Rhymes-with-Father-of-the-Bride is bringing his crafting A-game. And Mo and I will be sufficiently caffeinated. But there’s so much to do! So, if anyone is feeling particularly helpful and/or bored on Saturday, or if you just have a hankerin’ to create programs, favors, etc., West Hartford, Conn. is where it’s at!

Desperately seeking free time,
Sarah

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TheKnot.Com is Trying to Intimidate Me

August 26, 2010 at 10:05 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments
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As you may have guessed, I’m not what you might call TheKnot.com’s biggest fan.  Earlier this month I shared my suspicion that the sneaky website was trying to finagle an invite to my nuptials – today, I’m certain that’s what they wanted.  And since I so rudely rebuffed their trickery and campaign of guilt to secure one of our coveted invites, TheKnot.com has decided to engage me with intimidation tactics.  Don’t believe me?  Check out this email:

Don't threaten me, TheKnot.com!

Yeah.  TheKnot.com is trying to intimidate me.  “Sarah, here are all the things you will do wrong without us… You know you need us… Look at all the areas you could totally destroy at your big day by forsaking us… There’s still time… LOVE US!”

Well, TheKnot.com, I’m stronger than you think I am.  I’m not afraid of a little imperfection at my reception.  And I won’t succumb to Bridezilla-tendencies.  I’m not afraid of being a Bad BrideAgain.   

~Sarah

Restraining Order for a Website?

August 16, 2010 at 11:19 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments
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Speaking of creepy interwebs stuff, I would like to point out the stalkerishness of TheKnot.com.  I’ve already shared their cheese-free wedding ideas (still gives my bloggier half and my future hubs nightmares), but lately, they’ve been taking things even further, and it’s making me uncomfortable. 

For example, I recently received the following email from their team:

You're getting married? Can I come? Can I join you? Will you invite me?

That’s right, TheKnot.com is harassing me about when I’m getting hitched.  No more Mr. Nice Website: it wants to know if October 10, 2010 is still the big day, and it wants to know now.  It’s probably just worried that I won’t send an invitation, that it won’t be an honored guest at our nuptials.  And you know what?  TheKnot.com right to worry.  I’m not inviting it to our wedding.  And I resent their sneaky information hunt! 

So if this cunning website inquires if you, dear reader(s), know when I’m planning to make an honest man out of Andrew, please don’t share that information.  The last thing we need is a rude website crashing our wedding and getting’ all up in my dance space!     

~Sarah

Where’s the Cheese?!?

February 11, 2010 at 9:26 am | Posted in Married Life | 10 Comments
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Recently I received an email from e-wedding resource giant (and seller of personal information to anyone who’ll buy it) TheKnot.com that seemed to contain distressing information. The subject was: “15 Cheese-Free Wedding Ideas.”

If you’ve ever met Andrew, you will understand why this is so unsettling. As future grooms go, he is easy to please, and thus far I have discovered only a few areas where he’s unwilling to budge.  These include: a mandatory steak option on our reception menu, a cake preference of marble, and our cocktail hour MUST include an artery-clogging, lactose intolerant digestive attack-inducing amount of cheese, (especially sharp cheddar… Though, as we learned from Free Cheese Day, Cabot Cheddar is lactose free). Still not getting the picture? This guy eats whole blocks of cheese in one sitting! With or without crackers. And I adore him all the more for it!

Hoodles, back to the nuttiness at hand: a wedding without cheese… Upon receiving this email, I immediately forwarded it to my dear co-blogger so she could join my appalled state of mind.  Witness:

To April W.
From Sarah W.
The subject of this email frightened me immensely. This might be enough for Andrew to call off a wedding and just elope 😉

To Sarah W.
From April W.
That is horrific! I, too, was alarmed at the subject of this email. It makes me suspicious of The Knot. This is further ammo for Andrew’s call for eloping (elopement?).

Bolstered by my bloggier half’s support, I decided to share this atrocious email with Andrew. He took a quick glance at the subject line and gave me the look. You know, the one that conveys serious displeasure and super veto power. Normally I have only seen that look on mothers, but when it comes to cheese, Andrew can convey messages without a word, too.

But this email was like an accident scene and I simply couldn’t look away. And thank goodness for that! When I actually read the email itself, I discovered the real trickery of TheKnot.com. The needlessly alarming subject actually referred to maudlin wedding ideas, not dairy products. When I shared this with Andrew a look of relief so pure crossed his face – it was like glimpsing an angel – and he was instantly transformed back to the happy-go-lucky future groom we know and love.

So be warned, dear reader(s): if you are planning nuptials and succumb to the pressure of TheKnot.com, expect junk mail and spam email, stressful to do lists, and needlessly frightening puns.

~Sarah

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